Spaghetti a la Broke-Ass
Ingredients:
Spaghetti: Some
Barbecue Sauce: A lot
Butter: Quarter(ish)
Pickles: Make it rain
Grated Parmesan: Make it snow
Preparation:
1. Boil the spaghetti to a nice al dente. (The instructions are on the box, idiot.) If you need to test it, throw a strand at the wall. I don’t really know what that’s supposed to accomplish, but throwing food is fun.
2. Drain that sketti. If you don’t have a colander, just grab it with your bare hands like the snake scene in Pee Wee’s Big Adventure.
3. Add in some butter and let it melt around. Shout, “Fuck Paula Deen!” the whole time you’re doing it so no one thinks you’re racist.
4. Fuck that shit up with some BBQ. If you think you’ve added too much, you probably haven’t added enough. The whole situation should look like CSI Miami.
5. Get some pickles in the mix! What goes better with BBQ than pickles? Not a goddamn thing. No, it wasn’t the only thing in my fridge, why would you ask that?
6. Go fucking Scarface on the parm. Little known fact: the only person to ever say, “That’s too much parmesan” is Ultra-Hitler. (Ultra-Hitler is 10 Hitlers on each other’s shoulders in a large trench coat.)
7. Pasta goes a long way, so you should probably invite a dinner date over. Pop on an episode of The Sopranos and prepare to get laid. Pairs well with Grape Drank.
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